A Morning at the Building Counter
I am standing at the Building Counter in a local city hall. I hate building counters more than any place on Earth. They are evil. Just having to be there is an insult. Imagine a Doctor, a Lawyer, a Dentist, a Accountant having to submit treatment or work plans to a governmental agency before she or he could do a job. Well...in the case of lawyers it may be a good idea...
After a client finds me, I design his, her, or their space to the clients needs or desires. With an eye ever cocked to the Building Code and my well thumbed SIMPSON catalouge, the plans take shape. Compromises between art, desire,the code and the budget are made, then my ever helpful very conservative Structural engineer, Sam Knowels, who will be lawfully responsible for any building failure, has me make changes and revisions. Then some pinhead at the building counter, a wonder who has never designed or built anything, will judge my plans. So it is on this morning.
We are flipping through my plans, the cover sheet, the existing site plan, the remodeled site plan, the existing floorplan. Ah, we get to the remodel floorplan. Mr. Pinhead notices my five foot overhangs on the South and East facades and my mitred corner glass windows. The pinhead looks dismayed. He points out the overhangs and my mitred windows and announces to me "Frank Lloyd Wright is dead." I am shocked. I could swear I heard Mr. Wright standing over my right shoulder just two months ago as I drew the drawings chuckling with bitter amusement that I had stolden his effects, but that at least I stold them well. He did like my horizontal 1"x 12" rough sawn redwood siding (one hour fire rating and still comparatively inexpensive).He liked the idea of each 1"x3" batten providing a deep line of shade a horizontal ground line.
I flip through the drawings way down deep to the structural details. Thirty eight pages of 36"x42"sheets full of details and notation, for this 1546 square foot house. I show the posts, the double pinned finger jointed urathane glued structural select Douglas Fir 6"x14" beams cantilevered a whole 8% to support these corners. Next page I show the columns this is supported on in addition to the framing. I show the various SIMPSON connectors and hold downs and straps with their nailing. I show the oversized footings made just for his jaundiced squinty eyes. Mr. Pinhead looks at me and repeats "Frank Lloyd Wright is dead". The Pinhead then offers that mitered corner windows are forbidden in his City. I ask to speak to Mr. pinhead's supervisor.
Mr. Pinheads supervisor, his Excellency the Rat Bastard, arrives. We repeat looking through the drawings. Mr. Rat Bastard looks in fright at the corner windows. He is concerned with my cathederal ceiling, those "huge overhangs" deeply disturb him. I explain that we have have these overhangs to prevent heat build up and create a micro climate of of shade, and that I've ruffled the edges with a built up redwood facia to cut down the speed of our yearly "Devil winds " to a dull roar. I point out that a quarter of the overhang is actually open framing that will cast ever changing moving shadow on the building and walkways in August and again, slow down the wind near the house. He is troubled by my UL approved spray in fire resistive urathane foam insulation. he demands to know why I insulated the overhang. I explain that urathane foam has one of the highest R values per inch of any product, that we will be keeping the summer heat from building up on the home, that Air Conditioning will not have to be used, that the urathane actually is structural and stiffens the roof, and heaven forbid, should my Standing seam metal roof fail in fifty years, the urathane will keep water from entering any part of the house structure. METAL ROOF? NO METAL ROOFS IN MY CITY!! WE DONT ALLOW SHACKS HERE!! The Rat Bastard is yelling in public that the house I've designed is a shack, just because I've specified a roof with a sixty year rated lifespan? I contain myself. This is a miracle.
Mr. Rat Bastard shoves the plans back towards me and demands I revise them before submission. I insist he review them as they are. Mr. Pinhead stands in obvious proud joy next to the Rat Bastard.
I demand he justifies his denials in written form with findings. I mention that every product in my design, except the zero clearance fireplace and the now State of California required flourecent kitchen and bathroom lighting lighting has existed and been an approved material since before either of us was born. I have IBCO or City of Los Angeles numbers for everything written on the plans. All of my shear panels,headers, floor and roof sheathing, columns are in excess of anything the code requires. Mr. Rat Bastard and Mr. Pinhead are clearly pissed. I have insulted their governemental majesty by failure to instantly yeild and appropriatly grovel.
In spirit at least, Mr. Wright is not dead.
This is a normal day for a designer. I always wonder why Frank Lloyd Wright or John Lautner never pulled out a gun and went postal on a bunch like this. They never did. It was a miracle.
I leave. I go see Dwain Lind, a Nuetra apprentice and friend, who always suffers these problems. It's ten AM in the morning. We down a couple of Belgian beers each. The Belgians make good beer, good chocolate, and still allow each person to build INDIVIDUAL buildings. Nice people the Belgians.. Dwain reminds me that a average house is a eighteen month battle, a good one three years and an excellent one five.
This is why our whole built environment SUCKS. Mr. Pinhead and Mr. Rat Bastard are everywhere, gleefully announcing like a demented old drunk parrot "Frank Lloyd Wright is dead", and doing their wicked dead level best to make it so. Should they fail to destroy any art in a building, Greedy Developer Maximus stands by to help in the execution.
No one seems to notice that all the good or really great buildings sell or rent for price premiums when they are advanced of age, and the Architect is dead and may not enjoy this small victory. Why are those buildings more valuable on our heartless "market"? Because quite simply people WANT, they DESIRE buildings to BE in that feed their souls in addition to being places to sit out of the wind and rain. Sadly, one almost has to be a bizillionaire anymore to get to experience a space such as that.
SO another three to five year battle begins for a small house fit for a human being to live in. Can and will the client hang on?
This is why America is so ugly and mind numbingly the same as a place, the desire of some to make all others no better than themselves. As I use a church key to remove the top off my third Belgian beer, I wonder to Dwain " Will the next Revolution be fought by contractors and Architects?.... Hey we could build catapults and fire SIMPSON ECCU heavy timber hangers at the enemy.....
After a client finds me, I design his, her, or their space to the clients needs or desires. With an eye ever cocked to the Building Code and my well thumbed SIMPSON catalouge, the plans take shape. Compromises between art, desire,the code and the budget are made, then my ever helpful very conservative Structural engineer, Sam Knowels, who will be lawfully responsible for any building failure, has me make changes and revisions. Then some pinhead at the building counter, a wonder who has never designed or built anything, will judge my plans. So it is on this morning.
We are flipping through my plans, the cover sheet, the existing site plan, the remodeled site plan, the existing floorplan. Ah, we get to the remodel floorplan. Mr. Pinhead notices my five foot overhangs on the South and East facades and my mitred corner glass windows. The pinhead looks dismayed. He points out the overhangs and my mitred windows and announces to me "Frank Lloyd Wright is dead." I am shocked. I could swear I heard Mr. Wright standing over my right shoulder just two months ago as I drew the drawings chuckling with bitter amusement that I had stolden his effects, but that at least I stold them well. He did like my horizontal 1"x 12" rough sawn redwood siding (one hour fire rating and still comparatively inexpensive).He liked the idea of each 1"x3" batten providing a deep line of shade a horizontal ground line.
I flip through the drawings way down deep to the structural details. Thirty eight pages of 36"x42"sheets full of details and notation, for this 1546 square foot house. I show the posts, the double pinned finger jointed urathane glued structural select Douglas Fir 6"x14" beams cantilevered a whole 8% to support these corners. Next page I show the columns this is supported on in addition to the framing. I show the various SIMPSON connectors and hold downs and straps with their nailing. I show the oversized footings made just for his jaundiced squinty eyes. Mr. Pinhead looks at me and repeats "Frank Lloyd Wright is dead". The Pinhead then offers that mitered corner windows are forbidden in his City. I ask to speak to Mr. pinhead's supervisor.
Mr. Pinheads supervisor, his Excellency the Rat Bastard, arrives. We repeat looking through the drawings. Mr. Rat Bastard looks in fright at the corner windows. He is concerned with my cathederal ceiling, those "huge overhangs" deeply disturb him. I explain that we have have these overhangs to prevent heat build up and create a micro climate of of shade, and that I've ruffled the edges with a built up redwood facia to cut down the speed of our yearly "Devil winds " to a dull roar. I point out that a quarter of the overhang is actually open framing that will cast ever changing moving shadow on the building and walkways in August and again, slow down the wind near the house. He is troubled by my UL approved spray in fire resistive urathane foam insulation. he demands to know why I insulated the overhang. I explain that urathane foam has one of the highest R values per inch of any product, that we will be keeping the summer heat from building up on the home, that Air Conditioning will not have to be used, that the urathane actually is structural and stiffens the roof, and heaven forbid, should my Standing seam metal roof fail in fifty years, the urathane will keep water from entering any part of the house structure. METAL ROOF? NO METAL ROOFS IN MY CITY!! WE DONT ALLOW SHACKS HERE!! The Rat Bastard is yelling in public that the house I've designed is a shack, just because I've specified a roof with a sixty year rated lifespan? I contain myself. This is a miracle.
Mr. Rat Bastard shoves the plans back towards me and demands I revise them before submission. I insist he review them as they are. Mr. Pinhead stands in obvious proud joy next to the Rat Bastard.
I demand he justifies his denials in written form with findings. I mention that every product in my design, except the zero clearance fireplace and the now State of California required flourecent kitchen and bathroom lighting lighting has existed and been an approved material since before either of us was born. I have IBCO or City of Los Angeles numbers for everything written on the plans. All of my shear panels,headers, floor and roof sheathing, columns are in excess of anything the code requires. Mr. Rat Bastard and Mr. Pinhead are clearly pissed. I have insulted their governemental majesty by failure to instantly yeild and appropriatly grovel.
In spirit at least, Mr. Wright is not dead.
This is a normal day for a designer. I always wonder why Frank Lloyd Wright or John Lautner never pulled out a gun and went postal on a bunch like this. They never did. It was a miracle.
I leave. I go see Dwain Lind, a Nuetra apprentice and friend, who always suffers these problems. It's ten AM in the morning. We down a couple of Belgian beers each. The Belgians make good beer, good chocolate, and still allow each person to build INDIVIDUAL buildings. Nice people the Belgians.. Dwain reminds me that a average house is a eighteen month battle, a good one three years and an excellent one five.
This is why our whole built environment SUCKS. Mr. Pinhead and Mr. Rat Bastard are everywhere, gleefully announcing like a demented old drunk parrot "Frank Lloyd Wright is dead", and doing their wicked dead level best to make it so. Should they fail to destroy any art in a building, Greedy Developer Maximus stands by to help in the execution.
No one seems to notice that all the good or really great buildings sell or rent for price premiums when they are advanced of age, and the Architect is dead and may not enjoy this small victory. Why are those buildings more valuable on our heartless "market"? Because quite simply people WANT, they DESIRE buildings to BE in that feed their souls in addition to being places to sit out of the wind and rain. Sadly, one almost has to be a bizillionaire anymore to get to experience a space such as that.
SO another three to five year battle begins for a small house fit for a human being to live in. Can and will the client hang on?
This is why America is so ugly and mind numbingly the same as a place, the desire of some to make all others no better than themselves. As I use a church key to remove the top off my third Belgian beer, I wonder to Dwain " Will the next Revolution be fought by contractors and Architects?.... Hey we could build catapults and fire SIMPSON ECCU heavy timber hangers at the enemy.....
posted by Red Taliesin at 3:23 PM
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